I never thought I'd
hear myself say this, but holy crap, I would love to be
BORED.
Colorful words may be
used. don't be alarmed.
TRANSCRIPTION
Hello, my name is
Cindy Guentert-Baldo, and I need to be. Welcome to the uncurated
life podcast, or we talk about life both on and off of the
internet. If this is your first time here, I am so excited that
you're here. And if this is not your first time here, thanks for
coming back today. We are talking about boredom and why I need to
be bored and why I somehow cannot manage to be okay with being
bored.
It's a thing that I am
coming to terms with. I just got off of a three-day weekend and I
had some moments where I got bored and immediately turned to candy
crush. I'm actually going to be talking a little, you'll be hearing
a lot about candy crush over the next few episodes, but like, it
was like, I couldn't just sit and be bored.
And I realized that
this like constant busy-ness in my mind. Is one of the things that
is contributing to my massive sense of overwhelm. It occurred to me
that maybe I need to embrace boredom just a little bit. So let's
talk about being bored. Why is being bored? A good thing, because
it sounds like a bad thing, right?
Like when you're a kid
being bored is like the worst possible thing ever, you know, like,
oh my God, mom, I remember my kids being like, what can I do? What
can I do? What can I do? And I'm like, you can fuck off. I didn't
say that, but I wanted to.
One of the reasons I
think being bored really can frustrate a lot of us is because when
you're bored, it's like time moves slower because you're not
constantly busy, constantly. Everything else shit starts to drag.
And then as soon as you get wrapped up in something and suddenly
it's flying by. But I realized with as quickly as like February has
flown by for me, uh, maybe being bored and having that time going
slow could be a good thing.
There's an article. I
have a link and the articles I talk about in the show notes, this
one is from psychology today. It's by a Dr. . He wrote an article
called the benefit five benefits of boredom. And so I'm just going
to read through them really quick. The first benefit of boredom is
that boredom can improve our mental health.
So according to the
article, It says that in this age of information, our brains are
overloaded with information and distractions. The wealth of
information means a scarcity of attention. Attention uses one's
limited cognitive resources for productive activities. So taking a
break can be a valuable opportunity to help our overloaded brains
relax and alleviate stress.
It is beneficial to
step away from social media and other stressors long enough to feel
bored and quote. So right here is something that I think is a
distinction between. What I'm doing and what I might maybe should
be doing. I'm okay. With stepping away from social media and from
other things, I can do that for a few minutes.
I don't think I do it
long enough to get bored, because I think the moment I'm starting
to even brush against the idea of boredom I'm right back on my
phone or I'm right back in my book or I'm right back, whatever. So
there's a podcast. I'm sure you've heard of it. If you haven't.
It's awesome. It's called under the influence.
One of the things
they're talking about in the newest season is in the fall having a
day where women exit social media for a day to show the power that
women hold over social media, it doesn't really talk about
non-binary or other people, which is something that I've actually
been curious about. And I want to message them, but the idea here
is to step off for an entire day.
And I was listening to
her talking about, and I'm like, that's a great idea. And then I
was like, do I think it's a great idea because I want to show the
power that women have over the internet and like the internet
economy, or is it that the idea of just not being on social media
is. Refreshing. I don't know, but this idea of stepping away from
it long enough to be bored.
So not just stepping
away from it, but step away to actually our board. It's not
something I'm including in my March goals, but it might be
something I start to think about. Come. The second benefit to being
bored. According to the article, boredom can increase creativity
and can provide an opportunity to turn inward and use the time for
thought and reflection.
Boredom can enable
creativity and problem-solving by allowing the mind to wander and
daydream. People were in one study, people were made to do boring
tasks like reading reports or attending tedious meetings, the
boring tasks encourage their minds to wander, which led to creative
ways of thinking. The study showed that with mundane activities, we
discover useful ideas in the app.
External stimulation.
We use our imagination and think in different ways and quote, this
was kind of where the boredom came from. For me, the idea this,
this particular benefit was the one that was at top of my mind when
I was thinking about wanting to be board, was that one of the
things I want to do this year is more hobbies and really stimulate
my creativity outside of work so that it can like benefit my whole
life.
And I'm just not bored
enough. I don't think to really let some of those newer ideas start
from. One thought process I had when looking at this article was
like thinking about being in high school and being in a class that,
or a college middle school, whatever, being in a class that I
really wasn't into.
And I was a nerd. I
was into most of my classes, but there were classes I wasn't into.
And so I would start doodling and I'm a child of the nineties. So
often those doodles were like the Stussi S that special S or
drawing Tweety bird, or Marvin, the Martian. If you are a child
with it, like if you were a teenager in the nineties, you know
exactly what I'm talking about, the cover of my trapper keeper and
so on and so forth.
But I was, I would do
some of my most fun doodles when I was that bored. So this makes a
lot of sense. The third benefit to boredom, uh, from the article,
boredom motivates a search for novelty without boredom. Humans
would not have the taste for adventure and novelty seeking that
makes us who we are intelligent, curious, and constantly seeking
out.
The next thing,
novelty seeking implies dissatisfaction with the status quo and a
willingness to challenge established ideas and practices. Great
achievements are facilitated with dissatisfaction with the status
quo. And I'll tell you right now, this is when I read this benefit.
I was like, oh fuck. Yeah, because I am both an very intense
creature of habit.
Like I get stressed
out if my routines and my habits are funny. But I also do get
frustrated when I'm doing the same old, same old for too long, in
certain aspects of my life, especially creative aspects of my life.
I've always been somebody who kind of bounces like a hummingbird
from hobby to hobby. And I think that this idea of novelty and
seeking out new and interesting experiences is something that I am
really trying to lean into this year.
But it's kind of
fighting against my nature. I want these things, but my nature is
to stick, be a homebody stick to the things I know through teens. I
know the status quo is comfortable for me. And so stepping outside
of that is difficult. And I'm thinking if I can get bored enough,
that might motivate me to do it in a way that just saying, I want
these things.
Does that make sense?
I wonder if it does, it's making sense to me, at least from the
article, the fourth benefit of boredom is that boredom motivates
the pursuit of new goals. Boredom is an emotional signal that we
are not doing what we want to be doing. Being bored means we are
currently engaged, not only.
Uninteresting or
challenging situation, but also in a situation that fails to meet
our expectations and desires, boredom encourages us to shift to
goals and projects that are more fulfilling than the ones we're
currently pursuing. And here I think is maybe the crux of why it's
so hard for me to be.
Generally speaking, I
am not in an uninteresting or unchallenging situation with my life.
We moved to Denver that in and of itself is challenging. Right. But
I, my family has some challenging health problems right now, but
I'm relatively happy with the state of my life, with the things I'm
doing with whatever.
I don't feel very.
Dissatisfied with my life. What does she say in the breakfast club?
My home life is unsatisfying or my home life is satisfying. And I
recognize what a privilege that is, but maybe that's part of why I
don't tend to gravitate towards boredom aside from the fact that
I've always been someone who just can't manage to not be
busy.
I also am someone who
is relatively content with the state of my life. And so maybe that
is one of the reasons why I don't have that, like, kind of
wanderlusty achy feeling. And the fifth benefit of boredom,
according to the article is boredom and self-control skills boredom
affects the ability to focus and pay attention because the interest
is lost among students boredom results in disengagement, from class
and poor performance, they can feel bored when they lack the
cognitive resources to focus.
The ability to focus
and self-regulate is correlated with the ability to handle boredom,
learning, to endure boredom at a young age. Great preparation for
developing self-control skills, like regulating one's thoughts,
emotions and actions. Yeah, man, like that makes sense. I have
always been someone who feels like their brain is moving at a
million miles per hour, often faster than I probably want it
to.
And boredom has always
been really stressful for me. And so trying that maybe that's why
meditating has never really worked for me. Cause I get fucking
bored and I'm like, no, I don't want to do this. I want to do
something else. And so I'm thinking by facilitating some boredom in
my life, maybe that will help me a little bit when it comes to
focus issues I have in other areas, maybe I don't know.
Anyway, so I. I was
doing some more research into the idea of boredom, right? Like,
cause I was like, I know I want to be bored. I know that being
bored is something that's almost like aspirational to me. I've
joked a lot about when Jesse and I finally go on our honeymoon,
even though we've been married for fucking what, like eight years
now, I don't even know.
He, he knows I'm not
good at remembering these things, uh, by seven had a honeymoon yet.
But my goal honeymoon is to go somewhere, maybe tropical, where I
can like lay by. Like in a pool, be in a pool where the water is
filtered, but be in sight of the beach where there's no wifi, so I
can be bored, but that's my dream honeymoon.
And. I wonder
sometimes if I might hate it when I actually do it, because I'd be
like, fuck, I'm so bored, you know? But this idea of being bored to
me just feels right. It feels like if I can just manage to get to a
point where I'm like, fuck dude, I am so bored that it might help
me kind of rocket ship off into more interesting or new to me,
experiences and things.
So I was like, okay,
well, if I really want to be bored, and if being bored is something
that I've actively pushed against my whole life, then how do I get
there? You know, that's, that's easier said than done, but one of
the things I came across was another article that was on Zapier,
which I think is an app that lets you like connect things to get
out of whatever the article is, what I'm here for by Emily
Esposito.
And it's about the art
of being bored, how to be more productive by doing nothing. And the
specific thing I zeroed in on where the types of boredom, because
if I can identify with the type of boredom I want, maybe that will
help me get there. So the five types of boredom that she talks
about were developed by a team of German.
Researchers led by
Thomas guts. They wanted to dive deeper into the types of boredom.
And so they did a bunch of research. They studied high school
students and college students asked them to answer questions over
the course of a couple of weeks. And. They identified five
different types with unique characteristics.
These types are in,
I'm going to read from the article number one in different perhaps
than most neutral of the five people with indifferent boredom are
calm and withdrawn from the world. They use the words, relaxation
and cheerful fatigue to describe. Number two is calibrating
boredom, which refers to wandering thoughts and not knowing what to
do.
You want to change
your environment or behavior, but aren't actively finding
alternatives. This type of boredom is common when. Performing
repetitive tasks. Number three is searching boredom, which is
defined by a sense of unpleasant restlessness and an active search
for ways to minimize that boredom using two, usually turning to
activities and thoughts about hobbies, leisure interests in
school.
Number four is
reactant boredom, which is characterized by feelings of aggression,
reacted, boredom, motivates people to leave the boring situation
and avoid those responsible for it. People experiencing this type
of boredom have persistent thoughts about specific, more, highly
valued alternative situations.
And finally, there's
apathetic. This type of boredom operates at a different level than
the previous four. It's a deeper, more negative state of mind that
can be linked to feelings of helplessness and depression as well as
destructive behaviors. So when I'm looking at these five, I would
say that when I am bored, I tend to be in the world of.
Calibrating boredom
where the wandering thoughts and not knowing what to do and
apathetic boredom, which is where I go when I'm in a really not
great place. And that is, um, that tends to trigger some of my
anxiety and depression. So I think what I want is to bring into my
world more of the calibrating board.
Which is the board and
the happens with repetitive tasks and the indifferent boredom where
I'm bored, but I'm okay with it. Like I'm just, I'm, I'm, I'm
relaxed and I can just be bored and be okay with it. So that's what
I think I want to really search for. They offer in this article, a
couple of ideas of how to do it.
And the first one is
about choosing activities, right? So there's a bunch of mundane
tasks we have to do on a daily basis, whether they're work-related
or house related or whatever the case may be. And the point that
the article makes. And I super agree with this is that there are
some tasks that. Feel mundane and repetitive, but you still have to
focus.
The example they bring
up in the article is building a pivot table and analyzing data.
It's boring and it's tedious, but you have to focus on it. You
can't like. You can't let your mind wander right now for me, a task
like that would be, uh, prepping vegetables. Now I find chopping
vegetables to be kind of relaxing.
However, I could also
get easily bored by it if I'm just not in the right spot, but I
have to pay attention to what I'm doing. I can't let my mind wander
or I'll chop my finger off. You see what I'm saying? The other
thing the article brings up is that there are tasks that. Are
relaxing. That can be confused with boredom.
I brought up earlier
that meditation makes me bored, but they say that meditation is
actually meant to promote tranquility. The idea is to remove the
distractions and rid your mind of stimulation. Whereas boredom is
when you're trying to find the stimulation and you can't find it. I
don't know. I'm still pretty bored by meditation, but the point is,
is that might not be the way to find it a.
A task that they bring
up. That would be a really great example of a way to bring up that
like boredom of doing what is the calibrating boredom of doing
repetitive tasks is like stuffing envelopes for something like, if
you're doing wedding invitations or we were doing life campaign
with their, my church to send out things for donations or whatever,
stuffing envelopes, definitely a boredom inducing situations.
So coming up with
ideas, like for that, for me coming up with like a boredom list,
I'm going to maybe put that in my bullet journal in March makeup of
board and list. I'm gonna write that down. I'm gonna write down a
boredom list of activities that I can do that will kind of take the
stimulation out to.
But give me something
to keep me occupied so that my hands are working, but my brain can
wander. The second thing they suggest is to banish distractions,
which is the one we were already talking about with removing your
smartphones. One of the people referenced in the article is Sandy
Mann, who is a psychology lecturer at the university of central
Lancashire.
And she said, That
we're trying to swipe and scroll the boredom away. But in doing
that, we're actually making ourselves more prone to boredom because
every time we get our phone out, we're not allowing our mind to
wander and to solve our own boredom problems. So the suggestion is,
is to take your, don't take your phone out when you're standing,
waiting for something like I do this all the time.
I was standing,
waiting around. I bust out my phone and I play a little candy
crush. The idea here is to. To not to start getting the habit,
whether you have to put an app on your phone or something else of
not whipping your phone out in those little Mormon moments where
you could be bored. So that's something to work on.
I might turn that into
a habit for April as well. I don't know. And then the other
situation, the other idea they bring up, and this is one that I
need to take to heart, and that is to stop overbooking yourself.
You know, don't accept. Meeting. Don't always be going out
strategically block off boredom time in your calendar.
You know, some people
would say leave white space in your calendar, but this idea of like
making sure various time for you to get bored. It says here in this
article, uh, for some, uh, minutiae Zomorodi in a GQ article said
that being bored is like the stuff that feels super uncomfortable.
If you're not used to it, like going to the gym, it really hurts at
first.
But then you start
going maybe three or four times a week and it gets a little easier
and maybe you get a little hot, a little exercise high in the sweat
starts to feel good and it suddenly becomes part of your life. So
the idea is to. Treat boredom like a muscle and train it so you
don't lose it. And then you can go find your boredom, find your
time, spend that time being bored and make it a habit.
Making boredom a
habit. That's also a good idea. I should write that down. I'm going
to make myself a little list. I'm going to make myself a little
list. I want to make a boredom list and I want to do boredom habit.
I better write those down. Those will not be in my March video.
Cause I already filmed it.
You probably already
seen it at this point. However, I will be talking about that more
come April. I think, I think that is going to be a focus because
like I said, in the title of this, I want to be bored. Now what
about you? Do you want to be bored? Are you going to try some of
these things? Are you going to seek out the boredom in your
life?
I'd love to hear your
thoughts on it. Go to instant. Tag me at @llamaletters in your
story. And tell me your ideas, the things that help stimulate your
boredom. Are you trying to be bored? Do you think I am losing my
shit for wanting to be bored? Let me know. I'd love to hear about
it. This episode was brought to you by my patrons.
They're fucking
amazing. If you want to know about Patreon, go to
www.patreon.com/cindyguentertbaldo
to find out more. And in the
meantime, my friends, I hope you find some time this week to get a
little bored. I'm hoping I can too. I, I don't know if I'm going to
be able to or not, because this week is, you know, a busy week for
me, but we shall see wish me luck.
I'm wishing you. Well,
And until next time, peace out.